Thursday, 23 April 2009

Note to self - Teach children the art of people watching by stealth

On Tuesday we went to the park after school to try and dissolve any'post Easter/after school' arguments and whining. The idea being the kids would have a pinic tea in the sunshine and run wild on the adventure playground.

We are sat at the traffic lights, 4 year old in the front, 3 year old in the back.

4 year old - "Mummy, look at that TINY Grandma, look, look."

3 year old - "Where, where?"

I can see in my mirror that the 3 year old is actually considering taking off his seatbelt for a better look. I give him 'the glare' and he reconsiders and cranes his neck to see.

In order for me to look I have to lean really far forward to look at the woman in the passenger seat of the car next to us.

It's true, the woman in the passenger seat of the car next to us is in fact the TINIEST Grandma I have ever seen.

I look at the lady driver, our eyes meet. I look away quickly, embarrassed that I have been caught out staring at her TINY Grandma. I look in the opposite direction willing the lights to change.

Me - "Really, you mustn't stare"

3 year old - "I don't like that TINY Grandma"

Me - "Sit back and stop staring both of you!"

4 year old - "But she is soooo TINY, look, look"

Me - "Stop staring!"

I imagine the conversation in the other car ...

Woman in other car - "What is wrong with that child? She's bouncing about, shouting and staring at us. I bet the mother has been giving them too much sugar."

TINY Grandma - "Why is the one in the back with the big hair scowling at me?"

Woman in other car - "... and look, their mother is just ignoring them. Poor children"

TINY Grandma - "What chance have they got?"

Note to self - Teach children the art of people watching by stealth


Mum Gone Mad said...

Oh yes, kids and their observations... how do you laugh off "but mummy why is that lady so fat?" when you're sitting opposite them on the bus? I now wish I had seen a tiny grandma luv Karen x

Laura - Are We Nearly There Yet Mummy? said...

Recently all our 'moments' have been in the confines of our car.

Maybe this is my initial training for outdoor embarrassment.

... soon they will be freely opening their car windows when it gets warmer ... then I shall start wearing a disguise.

Kelloggsville said...

The car is no boundary for this :

SuperMarket queue: "why has that lady got a beard?"

McDonalds queue "Why didn't that fat man have a fruitbag?"

The Park "That lady's hair looks like {fill in any bizarre cartoon character}"

the possibilities for sheer embarrassment via child are endless..enjoy! ( love it x )

Coding Mamma (Tasha) said...

Rosemary pointed at a man down the street, the other day and shouted 'I don't like that man!' He was quite a long way away, so hopefully didn't hear. I wonder when tact and diplomacy sets in? Hopefully not too old!

Littlemummy said...

Erin made a friend on holiday who was wearing an eye patch. All weekend it was "Why does she wear an eye patch", "can I have an eye patch" (me: no, your eye is fine), "my eye is sore" etc.

We met the little girl in the swimming and Erin refused to talk,play or even acknoweledge her, "that is not Abby, she doesn't have an eye patch", the girl's mum and granny were right there. The shame..

Kylie w Warszawie said...

I'm glad I live in a country where my kids don't speak the language. Although they rarely ask embarrassing questions.

However, if my son's best friend asks me ONE MORE TIME if I am pregnant, I will beat the kid up. I don't care if he's 6. And I don't even look pregnant. His nanny is pregnant and he's got pregnancy on the brain.

Gaston Studio said...

Now that is something I don't miss about having young kids around. They can SO embarrass you and every adult in the vicinity!

Anonymous said...

Excellent, would hate to pull up in the car next to you!!

CJ xx

Robert said...

PLEASE, PLEASE don't teach your children to watch by stealth! Let them enjoy staring. They can get away with it! Same with comments. They'll grow up all too soon and then have to spend the rest of their lives worrying about what others are thinking of them. Let them enjoy their childish freedoms while they can. The only price we parents have to pay for this freedom of their's is a little embarrassment - don't you think it's worth it?

Under the Influence said...

Let me know if you master teaching that lesson!

lunarossa said...

At least your kids weren't pointing at them with their fingers as my daughter used to do, also outside the car, Very embarassing especially in this country. In Italy people would just laugh and keep on going. Ciao. A.

Dana's Brain said...

Oh the honesty of children. It kills me every time! Worse yet is when my son wants to point at something but knows it's not polite to point - so his hand starts to look like he has the youngest case of arthritis ever.

English Mum said...

Oh yes, definitely been there. #1 has a naturally loud voice and has a tendency to talk before thinking. One recent classic was (in a stage whisper that would frighten horses): 'do we have to queue, Mum? The man in front of us smells REALLY bad'!!

Evil Twin's Wife said...

Too funny!

Maternal Tales said...

I want to see the tiny Granny too. Just how tiny was she??

Edie about my cousin who visited yesterday - 'Mummy, Kate got a baby in her tummy.' (she doesn't, she's just fat - and she was standing right there).

Me - 'Kate doesn't have a baby in her tummy darling'.

Edie - 'Then why her tummy so big?'

Me - 'don't be silly, it's not big. i think it's just her skirt that makes her tummy look so big'.

Whoops - I think she must have learnt the art of diplomacy from me!

DJ Kirkby said...

Lol! N3S would ahve rolled the window down and shouted all that at TINY grandma. He is impervious to my glare, mores the shame.

Anonymous said...

Did you not take a photo of the tiny grandmother? Oh really, you are letting us down...

amy said...

ha ha! soooo funny! i love kids and their honesty x x

Jo Beaufoix said...

Hee hee, Miss M needs to learn this too. We had the 'Mummy, do me have handbags" incident not long agao. He hee. I wish you'd taken a photo of tiny Granny though. (Bad Jo).