The word 'holiday' (or vacation to some of you) doesn't mean the same as it did pre children.
I can remember a time when a holiday involved a sunbed and a book ... not sharing a sunbed with a soggy child whilst trying to get sand out of a swim nappy and shouting across a crowded beach to the husband that child number two needs a poo.
Pre children we packed a bag, got in the car and drove to France. We didn't book anything, we took a chance. Husband and I spent a leisurely week taking in the sights. We slept in a different hotel in a different town every night ... apart from one night when we slept in the car (not through choice). We ate great food, drank excellent wine and it was an adventure.
We went to Barcelona, ate tapas, drank too much, laughed even more and mooched. Perfect.
We went to the Edinburgh Fringe. Took in some street theatre, some comedy shows, more drinking, mooching and some afternoon naps back at the B&B. Aaaah, bliss.
Since having the children we have had a variety of holidays ... all lovely but not much relaxing involved. Just because you are sleeping in a different bed at night and smothering yourself in suncream by day does not mean that your children will suddenly need less attention.
If I'm not dreaming that the children are drowning in the swimming pool (is it just me?) then I'm listening to them whine because they are too hot or watching them flick sand in each others eyes.
And, how many times can a headstrong toddler take off their sun hat in the blazing sunshine?
Then there's the travel. Fly, drive, sail ... take your pick. It's almost guaranteed to give you palpitations at regular intervals.
Don't get me wrong, there have been some marvellous moments during our holidays, but the stress levels needed to get to that point are, well, high.
I'm sure as they get older it will become easier. For one, when they can both swim I can stop having the drowning in the pool dream, right?
Anyway, I have been given an opportunity. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity for a few reasons;
1. I'm going away without the kids
2. I'm going away without the husband
3. I'm going somewhere that husband would, in his own words, rather gargle with razor blades than visit
All in the name of research
I can't wait, in a matter of weeks I shall be ...
... I can't say anymore for fear of jinxing my freedom.
In time my pretties, in time.