Our local petrol station was rammed and judging by the faces of my passengers they wouldn't take kindly to waiting for 15 minutes on the forecourt.
"It's OK" I said "Let's go to the other one".
"This is boring" said the 4 year old, "I'm hungry" said the 3 year old
Got to 'other one' to find it being demolished.
"Don't worry, let's go to the next one" I said, slightly less jolly.
"This is sooo boooooring" said the 4 year old, "I want crisps" said the 3 year old.
Five miles later and some crying from the 3 year old who was both mortified and mystified that I could not produce a snack out of my arse whilst driving we arrived at the petrol station … which was rammed.
I agreed that if they stop being grumpy I'd purchase a snack from the petrol station and then we'd go through the car wash. A bit of food based bribery never hurt anyone. The carwash was just a bonus in my eyes.
"This is really b …" the 4 year old stopped herself as the word 'snack' registered in her head. "I want big crisps ... please" the 3 year old said with a big smile.
Their only experience of car cleaning has been with the husband, he uses the handwash people who give the personal touch with a chamois leather. They may not have a working Visa but when they've finished you can see your face in the bonnet and that's all that matters.
Petrol pumped, snack purchased and off we went into the carwash tunnel. I tapped in the code, the children ate cookies.
Off it went, I was super excited "Oooooh look at that" I said as foam covered the car, then the big brushes started up, "Wow, look at the big brush rollers" I said .... "Check out the car blow dryer, isn't it good?".
They looked disinterested with a hint of fear. The 3 year old had his fingers in his ears.
When the carwash had finished, I got out to admire the gleam. It was a bit patchy, but still, better than before.
When I got back in the car I turned round and said "Wasn't that fun?!"
The 4 year old handed me her cookie wrapper. The 3 year old didn't respond either, he still had his fingers in his ears
"Can we just go home now and watch TV?" said the 4 year old, "Juice please" said the 3 year old.
The 4 year old turned to her brother and said "Mummy can't magic juice out of her bottom you know!"